How long should you be dating before marriage

So, how to decide when to marry? How long should you date the person before thinking seriously about marriage? To figure that out, you first need to find out the reason why you want to get married. Is it because you don't want to be single? Or because you want financial support? Are you marrying for love? Or is your main aim to have kids? Is it because you are a relationship kind of person and need someone? Or is it because the person you want to marry makes your life better in many ways? You have to decide whether you need to marry, have to marry, or want to marry.

Once you figure that out, the rest is not very difficult.

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Why Are You Dating? Two possible answers for this all important question: If this is the case, then it depends on how long you have been dating. Some people find their soulmates when they are kids, and they date through high school, graduation and for the first few months of their jobs, till they settle into them and then get married. Some others find their partners just before they get out of college, so in spite of having steady jobs, they do not mind waiting for another year or two to get married.

It all depends on the couple's personal choice and their comfort level. But if you have found your sweetheart sometime ago and have been dating for a considerable time, and you are wondering how long to wait before marrying, here are a few concerns that should be addressed:. If the two of you are childhood sweethearts, then in many cases the couple does not want to wait any longer and marry as soon as they get out of college and land jobs.

They have been dating for years, they know almost everything about their partner, and so they see no point in wasting any more time 'courting'. On the other hand, if you have met your partner right before getting out of college, then it makes sense that you wait for a year or two and get to know each other better, while settling down financially, before you marry.

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Are You Financially Stable? Financial stability is very important for marriage. But an important thing to remember is that, sustaining a marriage requires money. So if you have just got a temporary job or one with a low salary, wait till you are better off and more secure financially. If you have waited all these years, then a year or two more is only going to make your relationship stronger.


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You'll thank yourselves later on. Decide a time frame if you want and aim and work to be financially settled in that period.

You have to make sure that you are ready to think for two, and as a couple, to make a marriage successful. If you are capable of putting the other person before you, their needs, comfort, and happiness before your own, then you are ready for marriage. If not, you need some more time. When you start making future plans which include your partner, it shows that you want to make it work and are mature enough to think for both of you instead of only yourself.

Science has some answers if that's your question, but we're here to tell you that's probably the wrong question to ask. Mialon published a study in the journal Economic Inquiry involving 3, couples. The study looked primarily at how wedding spending affected marriage length the moral of the story: Spend as little as possible and invite all the people you can.


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  • It also looked at other variables, such as the length of time couples dated before popping the question. That study found that, compared to dating for less than a year, dating one to two years before proposing cut a couple's risk of divorce by 20 percent. Dating three years or more slashed their divorce risk by half.

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    How Long Should You Date Before Getting Engaged?

    For example, couples who said they knew each other "very well" at the time of marriage also cut their risk of divorce by half. As you might have guessed, when it comes to marriage, relationship length isn't everything. In Jane Austen's "Sense and Sensibility," the character Marianne Dashwood says, "It is not time or opportunity that is to determine intimacy; it is disposition alone. Seven years would be insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other, and seven days are more than enough for others.

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    But there's a lot to be said for disposition when it comes to relationship success. A study by Diane Felmlee at the University of California, Davis found that some of the traits that attract people to their partners at first are the same ones that cause the end of a relationship. The most common of these so-called "fatal attractions"? That brings us to another fact about marital success: The smartest couples think hard about the future.

    A study from psychology researchers Laura VanderDrift, James McNulty, and Levi Baker found that how satisfied you think you'll be with your relationship in the future is linked to your level of commitment and the work you'll do on your relationship today. As relationship expert and university professor Eli Finkel told Business Insider , "The degree to which you're compatible right now isn't any sort of guarantee whatsoever that you'll be compatible even in three years or five years.